Man says to his wife : Let me take a picture of your breasts, than I can always look at them. Wife : Let me take a picture of you penis, I will have it enlarged.

My wife ran off with my best friend last week. Gawd, I miss him!

You see an awful lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy...

What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds.

"Woe to the man whose heart has not learned while young to hope, to love - and to put its trust in life."

Thank you for touching my life in ways you may never know. My riches do not lie in material wealth but in having friends like you - a precious gift from God!

SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED If you need advice, text me... If you need a friend, call me... If you need me, come to me... If you need money... ........... THE SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED!

Ä Ravan ki 20 aankhein thi magar nazar sirf ek aurat pe; jab ki aapki 2 aankhein aur nazar har aurat pe...! Toh asli Ravan kaun??

Keep me as a friend and I will keep you in my heart and lock it up. I'll throw away the key so that no one can take you away from me.

Ä God created the world in SIX days But took him centuries... to come up with someone...as beautiful.... as "YOU!" .. *

Getting married is like buying a dishwasher: You'll never need to do it by hand again.