Statistician: If you love someone, set her free If she loves you the probability of her coming back is high, If she doesn’t your relation was improbable anyway.

A friend is sweet when it is new. And it is sweeter when it is true. But you know what? It is sweetest when it is you.

A friend is a push when you have stopped, a chat when you are lonely, a guide when you are searching, a smile when you are sad, a song when you are glad.

One good turn gets most of the blankets.

F.U.C.K REMEMBER: if u need a FUCK, u can always count on me bcoz F.U.C.K stands for FRIENDS U CAN KEEP. Fuck 4ever, & promise me that we FUCK till eternity!

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

A blond woman picks up a 100. Was it a smart or a stupid blond one? ...................... stupid of course, there are no others

"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Walk beside me and be my friend."

3. Q: What is the definition of suspicion? A: A nun doing press-ups in a cucumber field.

# Love is when a wife makes coffee for her husband and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.

Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute.