Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

A note left for a pianist from his wife: Gone Chopin, (have Liszt), Bach in a Minuet.

How many trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb? 5, one to change it and 4 to tell him how much better they could do it.

# Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.

• Girl: If u'll try to kiss me, main shor macha doongi. Boy: Lekin yahan to dur-dur tak koi nahin hai. Girl: I know but formality to karni hi padegi…

Since distance equals velocity times time, let's let velocity and time approach infinity, because I want to go all the way with you.

• Girl's excuses: Phone mat kiya karo dear, mom hoti hai near, papa se lagta hai fear, baat nahin hoti hai clear. Isliye SMS kiya karo dear without fear n very clear

"If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, the entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand."

Door se dekha to Patthhar dikhta tha..... Dooor se dekha... to Patthharr dikhtaa thaa..... Paas jake dekha to... suchmuch Patthhar hi thaa.....

Two nuns in a bath. The first one says "Where's the soap"; the second one replies "Yes it does, doesn't it"