Computers are machines to help you solve problems you wouldn't have if you didn't have a computer.

SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED If you need advice, text me... If you need a friend, call me... If you need me, come to me... If you need money... ........... THE SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED!

One woman's hobby is another woman's hubby.

I was never tired of this life and it's not gonna matter if I fall down twice, coz I know each time I fall, you won't let me hit the ground. Thanks for being around.

"Don't forget to love yourself."

Does your name begin with: S For you, it is pleasure before business. You can be romantically idealistic to a fault and are capable of much sensuality. But you never loose control of your emotions. Once you make the commitment you stick like glue. You could get jealous and possessive. You tend to be very selfish often regarding yourself as the only human being on the planet. You like being the centre of attention. You are very caring sensitive, private and sometimes very passive. Turned on by soft lights, romantic thoughts. When it gets down to the nitty-gritty, you are an expert. You know all the little tricks of the trade, can play any role, or any game. You take your love life very seriously. You don't fool around. You have the patience to wait for the right person to come along. You are very generous and giving, often selfless. You are kind natured and sweet, which is found to be attractive by many. You are a good friend.

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

How many trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb? 5, one to change it and 4 to tell him how much better they could do it.

You and I would add up better than a Riemann sum.

• In a class, teacher asked: If I buy an item@ 12.75 n [email protected], it's loss or profit? Pappu: Profit in rupees & loss in paise