SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED If you need advice, text me... If you need a friend, call me... If you need me, come to me... If you need money... ........... THE SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED!

Sow your wild oats on Saturday night -- Then on Sunday pray for crop failure.

thE tEst oF fRiEndsHip dOseN't cOmeS wHen u R 2GethEr. It cOmEs wHeN u ParT waYs & u ReaLizE tHat dEsPitE tHe dIsTanCe, thE fRiEndshIp iS sTilL tHeRe...

If friends were flowers surely I would not pick you! I'd let you grow in the garden and cultivate you with love and care so I can keep you forever.

"Woe to the man whose heart has not learned while young to hope, to love - and to put its trust in life."

Why it's better to be a Woman! 1. We got off the Titanic first.

Why do men like blonde jokes so much? Because they can understand them

Sign seen on the back of a truck: Driver carries no money, his wife has it.

The third student to try it was the engineering student, who responded, "Well, actually, I'm not sure of your answer either. Let's see... 1 is prime, 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is ..., 9 is ..., well if you approximate, 9 is prime, 11 is prime, 13 is prime... Well, it does seem right.

Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = pregnancy Dumb man + smart woman = affair Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage

Why it's better to be a Woman! Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.