Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

• A very sexy n attractive female employee to her boss: Sir, Will you remove something from my breast? Boss:Wow! What? Ur eyes, sir !

Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do... but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.

"Love is not love that alters when it alteration finds."

F.U.C.K REMEMBER: if u need a FUCK, u can always count on me bcoz F.U.C.K stands for FRIENDS U CAN KEEP. Fuck 4ever, & promise me that we FUCK till eternity!

It is better for a woman to marry a man who loves her than a man she loves.

Remember that Brandy makes you Randy, Whisky makes you Frisky, but it's a good stiff Johnny Walker that makes you Pregnant.

When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.

When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen.

Pessimist : If you love someone, set her free. If she comes back, she’s yours, If she doesn’t, as expected, she never was.

# Love is when someone hurts you. And you get so mad but you don't yell at them because you know it would hurt their feelings.