Dear God, I will keep it brief otherwise they will steal my dinner. AMEN

"Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer."

"You don't marry someone you can live with - you marry the person who you cannot live without."

"True love never dies for it is lust that fades away. Love bonds for a lifetime but lust just pushes away."

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."

A friend is like a book that has to be read to appreciate its beauty. As such, you're one of the finest books ever written. How I wish you could be reprinted!

ä Do you know that you would look great with two pounds less ... in my opinion those clothes weigh exactly two pounds !

One good turn gets most of the blankets.

If thine enemy wrong thee, buy each of his children a drum.

To err is human...to blame your computer for your mistakes is even more human, its downright natural.

# If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate.