Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of person your spouse would have really preferred.

How is lightning like a violist's fingers? Neither one strikes in the same place twice.

When you harrass a boy, pull his pants down and your skirt up, because you can run faster with your skirt up than he with his pants down.

I have a pen which is blue, I have a friend which is you. Flowers will die, waters will dry, but our friendship will never say goodbye.

Husband: "Shall we try a different position tonight?" Wife: "That's a good idea.... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart. "

Do not marry a person that you know that you can live with; only marry someone that you cannot live without.

I thank the Lord for the gift of friendship where I can be myself and be accepted as I am and for finding a home in the heart of a friend.

One tree can start a forest, one smile can start a friendship. One touch can show you care, one friend can make life worth living for.

• Sex & Shopping have one thing in common: In both the cases, men start sweating in 15 minutes & women want to go on and on and on and on!

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food and companionship. She goes Mondays, I go Fridays.

Tairna Hai To Paani Main Aao, Kinare Pe Kya Rakha Hai Ishq Karna Hai To Bahar aa, Ishare main Kya Rakha Hai