A friend is a push when you have stopped, a chat when you are lonely, a guide when you are searching, a smile when you are sad, a song when you are glad.

"To love another person is to see the face of God."

• Viagra now available in powder to put in tea, does nothing for erections but stops your biscuit from going soft.

• Sex & Shopping have one thing in common: In both the cases, men start sweating in 15 minutes & women want to go on and on and on and on!

If you want to be happy for a day, get a date. Happy for a week, get a lover. Happy till the end, keep me.

Is this seat empty? Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

Does your name begin with: A You are not particularly romantic, but you are interested in action. You mean business. With you, what you see is what you get. You have no patience for flirting and can't be bothered with someone who is trying to be coy, cute, demure, and subtly enticing. You are an up-front person. You often don't get hints and you never pass any. Your mate's physical attractiveness is important to you. You find the chase and challenge of the "hunt" invigorating. You are passionate, as well as being much more adventurous than you appear; however, you do not go around advertising these qualities. Your physical needs are your primary concern. You tend to be very selfish, and not very emotional. You and your needs matter most. Others and their feelings come second. Your choices aren't very good and can only lead to trouble. You are very self satisfied and egoistic.

Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute.

# When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.