Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."

A friend is sweet when it is new. And it is sweeter when it is true. But you know what? It is sweetest when it is you.

The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions.

Pessimist : If you love someone, set her free. If she comes back, she’s yours, If she doesn’t, as expected, she never was.

Why it's better to be a Woman! 1. We got off the Titanic first.

What is a friend? She looks out for you, inspires you, laughs with you, cries with you, understands you, guides you and walks with you. That's what a friend is…you.

Hey, baby, what's your sign? Do not enter. or Stop.

"Sympathy constitutes friendship; but in love there is a sort of antipathy, or opposing passion. Each strives to be the other, and both together make up one whole."

I admit I'll never be the perfect friend. I'll never be there always. I may not make you smile at times but there is one thing I admit I could do. To be the person I could be for you.

Man: I would really like to get into your pants. Woman: No thanks. There's already one asshole in there.

What's the difference between blonds and traffic-signs? Some signs say stop.