Hey, baby, what's your sign? Do not enter. or Stop.

HOW "THEY" DO IT WHEN IT COMES TO SEX Jockeys gallop hard and finish fast

Hey, buddy, how late does the band play? Oh, about half a beat behind the drummer.

My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.

Text messaging is like a blow-job off an amateur prostitute; short...sweet and always cheap!!!

Does your name begin with: S For you, it is pleasure before business. You can be romantically idealistic to a fault and are capable of much sensuality. But you never loose control of your emotions. Once you make the commitment you stick like glue. You could get jealous and possessive. You tend to be very selfish often regarding yourself as the only human being on the planet. You like being the centre of attention. You are very caring sensitive, private and sometimes very passive. Turned on by soft lights, romantic thoughts. When it gets down to the nitty-gritty, you are an expert. You know all the little tricks of the trade, can play any role, or any game. You take your love life very seriously. You don't fool around. You have the patience to wait for the right person to come along. You are very generous and giving, often selfless. You are kind natured and sweet, which is found to be attractive by many. You are a good friend.

You see an awful lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy...

MAN.ZIP: Funny program. Expect a laugh when unzipped.

Friends are like mangga... you'll never know which is sweet and which is not. Well I'm lucky coz I was able to find the sweetest mangga in you!

# Love is when mommy sees daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross.

What is the difference between playing an English horn solo and wetting your pants? Both give you a warm feeling, but no one else cares.