Husband: "Shall we try a different position tonight?" Wife: "That's a good idea.... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart. "

It is because light travels faster than sound that some people appear bright until they speak."

"If you should die before me, ask if you could bring a friend."

Ghar ghar main diya jale To diwali mat samjho Agar main tera peeche paroon To mawali mat samjho

Schwarzeneggers fans: If you love someone, set her free SHE’LL BE BACK !!!

For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction.

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# Love is when mommy sees daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Denzel Washington.

FRIENDS 4 LIFE Without humor, life sux. Without courage, life is hard. Without love, life is hopeless. Without friends like you, life is impossible!

In a restaurant window, "Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up."

What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away? Root position cords.