If you practice, tune, make a sound check, and sit down to play, it's folk music. Otherwise, it's bluegrass.

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

In a restaurant window, "Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up."

"If today is the first day of the rest of your life, then what the hell was yesterday?"

Why do so many fishermen own banjos? They make great anchors!

"Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more it is willing to see less."

Ninety percent of men cheat in marriage. The rest do not marry.

I always thought loving someone is the greatest feeling, but I realized that loving a friend is even better. We lose people we love, but we never lose true friends.

"You don't marry someone you can live with - you marry the person who you cannot live without."

Two nuns in a bath. The first one says "Where's the soap"; the second one replies "Yes it does, doesn't it"

Why do so many fishermen own banjos? They make great anchors!